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Acceptance and Consistency

Posted on by rd4uwellness

“I just need to figure out how to stay consistent.” These are the words my husband said the other morning that may have altered the course of my year. A few weeks ago, as I was reflecting on 2019 and setting goals for 2020, one theme kept coming up for me and that was acceptance. I will talk more about this in a separate post, but it occurred to me that for the past six months or so I had been fighting a battle against my current situation and it was exhausting.

 I started Healthy Wife, Healthy Life last June because I wanted to share my experience with disordered eating and exercise obsession and how I finally found balance and help others do the same. Shortly after launching however I found out we were expecting Baby #2. Initially I was thrilled that I would have even more content to share, but this pregnancy proved to be a little different than my first throwing me way off my normal routine. In addition, my husband had taken two promotions at his job requiring frequent overnight travel, I accepted a new contract position, and I had my hands full raising a very strong-willed 3-year-old. All of this left me feeling frustrated, exhausted and if I am being honest resentful at times. I kept looking for a solution that would give me more time to work on my business and get back on track with working out and cooking healthy meals, but it just wasn’t there.

During the Christmas season, I was participating in an Advent program and one of the daily videos talked about how as humans we tend to overcomplicate things and become easily overwhelmed when often our biggest problems can be solved with really small solutions. That was it – it was like a lightbulb went off and I realized all the frustration and anger I had been experiencing could be solved with one small solution… acceptance! I simply needed to accept that I was in a difficult chapter of life and although things were hard, by focusing on gratitude, I could alter my reality. I mean I am pregnant with a healthy baby boy, my husband has a job that allows me to stay home with our kids, and I was able to secure a contract position that allows me to contribute financially to our family… How could I possibly feel resentful?

 All this acceptance however had me considering if I needed to accept that perhaps it wasn’t the right time to continue to try to run a social media/blogging business…  and then Jeff said the words “I just need to figure out how to stay consistent” and that was it – I knew what I had to do. I owed it to myself and all of you who have continued to follow and like my page to continue my mission of helping people understand that living a healthy lifestyle doesn’t have to be complicated. I have accepted this will be a slow transition back to regular posting with baby boy due in eight weeks, but I am thankful for all of you and if I can help one person find balance and  understand what it means to stay consistent then it will be worth it.

Because Sometimes You Just Have to Know When to Ask for Help.

Posted on by rd4uwellness

Because sometimes you just have to know when to ask for help.

My pregnancy with Tessa was an absolute dream. I felt amazing and loved every second of being pregnant and watching my body change as I grew this tiny miracle… Annndddd then she was born, and I was hit with what I now know was crippling postpartum anxiety further fueled by postpartum thyroiditis.

I didn’t know postpartum anxiety was a thing and I wasn’t experiencing the classic postpartum depression symptoms. I bonded immediately with Tessa and I certainly didn’t want to hurt her or myself, but I also wasn’t enjoying being a new Mom. I lived in constant fear of any and every worst-case scenario and suffered with these crazy intrusive thoughts for nine long months before finally giving in to trying a low dose of Sertraline (Zoloft).

I had been stable-ish on the medication since March 2017 and decided to wean after finding out we were expecting Baby #2. At first my mood and energy were great… once again better than normal and I kind of expected that to continue throughout my pregnancy. Wellllllll all of that happy came to a screeching halt around the 6-8-week mark when my anxiety started to look and feel more like little fits of rage. I remember the first day I felt this shift in my mood, I had been increasingly annoyed by little things Tessa would do. We were out to dinner and she was having trouble sitting still which is nothing new for her, but as a result her crayons kept falling on the floor. I swear something about the sound of those crayons hitting the floor made me want to flip the damn table. Years of therapy have afforded me the ability to analyze my mood and thoughts and I knew this was out of the ordinary for me.

I struggled with this rage for the next 6 weeks or so assuming it was pregnancy related and convinced it was this boy pregnancy wrecking havoc on my hormones until I just couldn’t take it anymore. I HATED who I had become and was wrecked with guilt that would leave me sobbing then exhausted for days after a particularly bad episode. I started to worry that Baby #2 was making me a monster and I knew I needed to get help before things spiraled any further out of control.

I’m so thankful to live in a city that has amazing hospital systems and programs like the Alexis Joy D’Achille Center for Perinatal Mental Health. I have only had two therapy sessions so far and this morning will have my third session then meet with a Prenatal Psychiatrist to discuss medication options. To be 100% honest I am still really unsure what I want to do about the medication. I know the studies say some are safe, but I had really hoped to get through these 40 weeks without. I had also hoped to get through these 40 weeks without intense feelings of anxiety, rage, guilt, sadness, depression and exhaustion. Yikes – that sounds awful huh?!

If you have managed to read this far you are probably wondering why I am sharing this. The truth is – this is not easy for me. As I have mentioned before I am a recovering perfectionist and I would much rather post only the happy pictures and have everyone believe I am living the dream with a perfect pregnancy, but I made a promise to myself that I would be REAL when I decided to launch Healthy Wife, Healthy Life.

If you are pregnant or have recently (or not so recently) given birth and you are wondering if you might be suffering from postpartum anxiety, PLEASE mention it to your doctor. Here is the link for the Alexis Joy D’Achille Center for Perinatal Mental Health:

https://www.ahn.org/womens-behavioral-health/locations/alexis-joy-dachille-center-for-perinatal-mental-health

If you are experiencing symptoms such as weight gain or loss, anxiety, loss of focus, fatigue and constipation you may also want to request that your thyroid blood levels be checked. Postpartum thyroiditis affects a small number of women but can easily be mistaken for normal postpartum symptoms which is what I dismissed my symptoms as when my OB gave me a script for bloodwork. You can read more about postpartum thyroiditis here:

https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/conditions-and-diseases/postpartum-thyroiditis

Team Beachbody Coaching

Posted on by rd4uwellness

What comes to mind when you hear the words “beach body?” For me, it automatically brings up feelings of anxiety thinking of the 15 or so years I spent trying to obtain the “perfect” body! I spent plenty of time at the beach throughout those years, but I wasn’t in my body. I was in my head, OBSESSING over every calorie, every stretch mark, and every imperfection. I may have had a beach body, but I was far from healthy. You might be surprised then to hear that I have signed on as a Coach with Team Beachbody! WHHHHATTTT??? I know but hear me out! I love Beachbody. Their programs are incredible, and I have been doing them for years. From the 21 Day Fix to Body Beast to Autumn’s Maternity Workout, their programs have helped me stay fit and healthy throughout various times in my life. There are a
few aspects of this type of program however that have prevented me from signing on as a coach sooner:

  1. The time sensitive aspect of the programs and challenges. One thing that keeps many of us from becoming the best versions of ourselves is that we focus so much on perfection that we forget to celebrate progress. Most Beachbody programs have a set
    workout schedule. Let’s take the 21 Day Fix for example… there are 27 workouts to be completed in 21 days. Now I am no math whiz, but that is more than one workout per day on average. What happens if you get sick or have a weekend getaway planned or your sitter calls off, etc.? Or what if you simply cannot commit to a workout every single day?! Many people just say f**k it, fall off the
    wagon, let it run them over and drag them a few miles down the road where they lay in a ditch for a few weeks, months or even years before dragging their asses back on the wagon. Well not here! Life happens and the point is that you are moving, and you are doing the best you can, so if your 21-day program takes you 60 days to finish that’s PROGRESS! I will help you brush your shoulders off and hop right back on that wagon because ain’t nobody got time to be laying in a ditch for a few years.
  2. The diet and supplement “requirements.” Read my lips: If you are partnering with me nothing other than a desire to be your best self is required! I am a Registered Dietitian so yes of course helping people eat better is what I do, and when it comes to weight loss it is 80/20 diet/exercise, but even if you change nothing about your diet, you are going to see and feel positive changes. And guess what? It’s a domino effect – you start feeling better, you start eating better, you start feeling even better, you start eating even better… you get my point. Sustainable weight loss is about lifestyle change and it doesn’t happen overnight (or in 21 days). You may make some significant changes, but you must maintain the lifestyle after the program/challenge ends, and I am here to help you do that!
  3. The before and after photos. As a body positive and food friendly RD something about before and after pictures has never sat quite right with me. It always triggers me. Don’t get me wrong… I have seen some insanely impressive transformations and have documented my own transformations in the past, but as I navigate this new phase of life as a Mom to a sweet, beautiful, smart, and funny girl; I want to take the focus OFF the body. I want to hear how much fun the workouts are, how amazing you feel after each workout, how much more energy you have and how your confidence and productivity have gone through the roof. If you want to document your progress AWESOME, but let’s call them progress photos because “after”sounds like the end of something and I already told you how I feel about timelines! And please let’s focus on some of the other amazing benefits too!

If you are ready to begin or continue your fitness journey and want support from a busy Mama who gets it or if you want to join me as a Coach email me at rd4uwellness@gmail.com or send me a private message and we can discuss what options might be best for you.

Hi! I’m Renee and I’m…

Posted on by rd4uwellness

Hi! I’m Renee and I am a wife, mom, Registered Dietitian, and recovering perfectionist. I was recently asked what my greatest passion as a dietitian was, and before my brain could even catch up with my mouth I blurted out “to help people understand it doesn’t have to be so complicated!” W.T.F. Ok, now that my brain has caught up let me explain. I might be a dietitian, but I love food. I do not want to live in a world without cheese, I could eat some form of potato every day, and chips and ice-cream have my heart. I have always loved these things, but I didn’t always allow myself to enjoy them. I’m not saying I didn’t eat them, but I didn’t enjoy them. At some point in my late teens, I decided my thin-framed dancers’ body wasn’t good enough. It wasn’t thin enough or fit enough and it didn’t look like the fashion or fitness models featured in my favorite magazines. I blamed this on my love for Doritos (Cool Ranch in particular,) and from that moment forward I began to fear food. Let me be clear – I was nowhere near overweight. In fact, I was borderline underweight, but the fear of “getting fat” took up residence in my 18-year-old brain and camped out for the next 15 years or so. My therapist, who has become infamous among my friends for her witty explanations of my behavior over the years, has best described  me as “obsessive compulsive with an anorexic flare.” She nailed it! I wasn’t extremely restricting my eating or unwilling to maintain a healthy weight, but I did have an intense fear of gaining weight, a distorted body image, and I OBSESSED over controlling my weight and shape. I spent 15 years or so living outside of my body and in my head obsessing over what I ate, what I was going to eat, how many workouts I could get in, etc. and well that isn’t really living is it?! In 2015 when I left my corporate job I was in the best shape of my life, but I was far from happy. I spent every minute of the day terrified that one wrong move and I would lose everything I had worked so hard for. That’s when I decided enough was enough! I enrolled in the Institute for the Psychology of Eating’s Eating Psychology Coaching Program. Between the program and my own personal experiences, I can say it was worth every penny. I am now living. Really living! In my body, not in my head. Not counting calories or tracking macros. Not forcing myself to do workouts that I hate and drinking terrible tasting protein shakes. I am finally free and living my best life and I want to help you do the same. I have watched countless friends and family members suffer through cleanses, the latest fad diets, and torturous workouts only to fall off the wagon and end up right back where they started. Don’t go to another party and skip the cake because you are on a “diet.” Get out of your head and stop obsessing about weight and calories. I created this blog/page/etc. to share my experiences and my expertise to help you start living your best life. I am not perfect – I still have rough days and we are here to help and support each other. The best part? No acai smoothie bowls or kale salads required. I am here to offer you solutions for real life. For busy Mom’s, college students or corporate professionals. You don’t have to be a wife or a Mom to benefit from the info I will be sharing. If you are ready to become the best version of yourself and start living in the moment then you are in the right place. I can’t wait to get to know you better <3